"[Your name Here] Has a Dream!"

Arguably the best, most inspiring phrase in this common era was articulated by the Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. when he boldly stated, “I have a dream.” Talk about your audacity of hope! Talk about having courage in the valley of fear. Talk about having 20/20 night vision. Dr. King dared to believe in the middle of despair, and declared those beliefs in a world that was still shaping. With that declaration, he breathed life into a disease-ridden humanity and helped us to universally get back on the road to
recovery. By the ways, what is a dream? A dream is the ability to see a vision
within your mind’s eye, in spite of your surroundings. Mainly because your eyes
are closed, your immediate environment has no visual effect on what plays into
your dream. In essence, this is what Dr. King did; he closed his eyes to his
immediate environment and had a dream. A beautiful, more perfect dream. A dream
where “the sons of former slaves and the sons of former slave owners would be
able to sit down at the table of brotherhood.” But my question is, “What will we do at this
table of brotherhood?” According to the Table of Brotherhood Project, produced
by Chevrolet and others, the answer is:

Talk.

No offense to them, or to anyone who expresses their positive opinion, but quite frankly, the time for talk is over. Talking yields little to no results. It’s the reason why husbands roll their eyes and sigh a sigh of grief when their wife says she wants to “talk”; the fear of inconclusive banter. Circumlocution. But alas, sometimes talking can inspire. But that inspiration should lead to motivation. And motivation should lead to action. If you get nothing else from this “introduction”, please allow me to insert a famous line from the poetry group Cypress Hill.

“Time for some action”

So that I won’t be guilty of overstating this with too much verbiage, let me get down to my main point: MLK’s dream will be realized when you follow YOUR dream. As I was discussing with another friend, MLK’s dream of unity and civil rights is being achieved in this present day and age. Yes, there still are inequalities and injustices still in different places, but the overall spirit of civility is more common than not; now more than yesteryear. So in essence, we’re at the threshold of the “promised land” (though some haven’t gotten the memo yet). And similar to the story in the Bible, in order to seize this land some action
items mixed with faith have to be implemented. Most of us have the faith, and
we’re already “talked” up enough, but what are the action items?

To literally go after your dreams.

I was inspired by the quote that said “It takes courage for people to listen to their own goodness and act on it.” (Pablo Casals) Well, I’ve had a few conversations with people who have million dollar ideas; people with dreams for starting a non-profit, a business, or a ministry. People who have had an idea in their mind for years, but are a little nervous about looking into it. Yes, you! Follow your dream! I will say that I also know people who are taking the courageous route and going after their vision. I wholeheartedly applaud you. But for those of you/us who still are making excuses about why they haven’t started yet, excuses be damned. Please don’t make me quote famous entertainer MC Hammer or the more
contemporary group Black Eyes Peas. Just please get started already.

The fact that we live in a better world today, with room to breathe, is your green light to go. The path and the way have been paved. It’s been paid for with the blood, sweat and tears of all of our ancestors. We’d be doing them a disservice if we just sat on our can and kept talking about “One day…” I’m often inspired by the gold rush of 1849. There
were thousands of families heading West into uncharted territory, all with the
lure of a richer life. They left security for insecurity. They left stability
and certainty for word of mouth and promise. Where is that spirit today? Have
we gotten so anesthetized with the cares of this life, that we’re not willing
to take calculated risks for the vision that’s in our hearts? These things
ought not be. And here’s the bonus: some of your dreams are way bigger than
you. Therefore you’re going to have to invest in your kids and/or your
community of connections to see the dream go on well after you expire. But you
have to get started now.

So folks, in order for Dr. King’s dream to become a reality, YOU have to follow YOUR dreams! Take charge of your destiny. Ignore your immediate surroundings. Walk by faith and not by sight. For Dr. King’s sake, “Go confidently in the direction of your dreams.”--H.D. Thoreau

Technology Vs. Live Music: Which is Better?

Willie Jolley couldn’t believe it. He thought the only place machines could replace men are in factories, or in movies; but never in the music industry. Maybe even electronic instruments replacing acoustic ones, but for a machine to replace a singer? Preposterous! But there he was, a successful night-club singer replaced by the latest craze of the early nineties; a karaoke machine.

This was just another step in machines’ evil
conspiracy to take over the world. I honestly don’t foresee that happening
until around the year 2222. But until then, musical electronica—and its
popularity—has slowly infiltrated the hearts and minds of music fans worldwide.
But why? Is it because it’s so darn easy to create and play music these days? (
Steve Jobs with his fancy-shmancy Apple products just continue to make things
easier and easier) And with the decline of instrumental music programs in urban
schools, will playing a musical instrument be on the “Endangered Arts” list? (I
just made that up). But on the flip side, when it comes to High School proms,
weddings and other parties, it becomes much more cost effective to hire a DJ
than to hire a couple of dinosaurs who know how to play that “trumpet-thingy.”
So which is better? I cannot answer that question for you. I can only give you
a fresh perspective on the topic (and hope that my preferences don’t bleed
through too much.) But in the end, when it comes to making a selection on tech
vs. live, I hope you become better informed.

Tech Music—everything electronic including iPods, CD
players, iTunes etc.

Firstly, for all ye who are not musically inclined (shower singers, air drummers, etc) thank
God in Heaven that you live in the 21^st Century. These days, in
order to listen to music—any music, your favorite type of music—all you have to
do is push ‘Play’. Nevermind the fact that real live people have spent
countless hours slaving over the just the right sounds for our whimsical
pleasure. But nevertheless, pre-recorded music is ready for our instant
gratification. And this comes in handy for several occasions. Whether we need
some motivational music to jog to, or something as elaborate as a business
convention meeting; being able to cue and play just the right song at just the
right time is the convenience of the ages. (Right behind sliced bread and the
TV remote control). Also, event planners and their budget-watchdogs need to
also rejoice. Instead of having to negotiate and make arrangements for a
handful of musicians, who sometimes can be a hand-full themselves, it’s much
easier to contract with 1 person who has the latest in DJ’ing equipment. (Which
these days can easily be just an iPod connected to mammoth speakers) For that
matter, DJ’s can likewise rejoice! Long gone are the years when they had to lug
around their archival collection of vinyl records and manually fine tooth comb
through each one just to play the right song. Now, the only time they need to
take is to download songs to their electronic storehouse. ‘Plug-n-Play’ music
also becomes convenient when the event calls for the rapid transition between
songs. Suppose you want only the chorus to the Kool and the Gang’s
“Celebration” but then, an immediate cut to Queen’s “We Are the Champions.” It
would take even the most professional musicians several hours just to get that
right. But if you want it right away—in a moment’s notice—all it takes is ‘click-play-click-play’.
I’m telling you, this modern day convenience could hardly become better! Side
note: I’ve always felt like convenience is the breeding ground for laziness;
and laziness begets atrocities. Air-go, convenience is the devil!

Live Music—all singing and live musical instruments;
both acoustic and electronic.

There I was; a grown man drooling on the floor (Not
literally, but still). I was supposed to be waiting tables at a local night
club, but I could not take my eyes and attention off of the entertainment. The
saxophone player was playing 2 saxes at once!! Did you just understand that?!
Two saxes at once!! And was harmonizing both of them!! Sure, music history
indicates that it’s been done before, but I’ve never seen it live and in
person!! So, when I managed to pull myself away from the jaw-dropping action
and look for the ‘reaction-shot’ of the club patrons, I was even more shocked.
The sax man could’ve been playing 2 kazoos for all they cared or knew. I think
the only way they would’ve paid attention is if he simultaneously set his hair
on fire. And even then, one of the clubbers probably would’ve just asked him to
help light their cigarette.

How can these things be?

Sorry, but all you non-musicians just don’t
understand. (But I do give credit to those who don’t play an instrument, yet
their musical acumen is astute) But for the rest of the population, they just
don’t get it. It’s okay, I understand. It’s the same reason why most men
normally hate going to the ballet with their significant other. (Most) men
don’t understand ballet. Or even the same reason I leave the room whenever my
wife turns the TV to So You Think You Can
Dance. It does nothing for me. But my wife, she gets it. Because she was
trained in dance, she understands what an arabesque is; she knows how to do a
plié; and she knows what perfect lines should look like. So, when she sees a
dance performance, she looks for examples that reflect her core knowledge of
dance. She knows when a dancer executes a spin perfectly and in form. She knows
when they hit the mark (and when they don’t). Me…enh, not so much. Only because
I’m married to a dancer, do I appreciate the art; but only by association. You
do not find my wanting to buy tickets to the latest dance performance. But if
you set one of the dancer’s hair on fire, then I’ll watch!

I think you get the point by now. Most people don’t
understand the skill vs. ability it takes to, not only play a musical
instrument, but to enhance the auditorium with your musical prowess. And don’t
get me started with the magic in a band or group! The magic that comes with
playing in a band is much more than just everybody doing their part. My friend
Dave B. explained it best. Music is nothing more than just organized sound
waves, or vibrations. He said, similarly, each band member emits a
vibe/vibration. Comparable to tuning a radio to a certain frequency to pick up
the right radio station channel, magic happens when band members/singers get on
the same vibration while producing music. Perfect ‘harmony’ is when ALL band
members and singers are ‘vibing’; not just keyboards and drums, or singer and
guitar player. Rarely achieved, I’ve been blessed to be a part of that magic
and witness it for myself. In a word: sublime.

So when it comes to your event, I suppose it depends
on what your preferences are. If you are overly concerned about budget or
space, than having a band may not be right for you. But if you’re anything like
me, first of all, I’m sorry! You, just like me, are a people person who gets
down right enthralled when people take the Rodney King way of life: “Can’t we
all just get along?” If you’re like me than you see the magic that happens when
people live in harmony; coalescing and coexisting without contention. So it
capitalizes on your ‘harmony-fetish’ when you see a small group of people
achieve what is rarely done in society through music. Getting on the same
accord. If that’s your fancy, or anywhere along that spectrum, than you should
choose live music.

Or if that’s too much for you, you can always just click
‘Play.’

Homophobia: a Psychological Review

In this entry, I will attempt to uncover and explain some of the social
perceptions and prejudices that exist---real, imagined, legitimate and
illegitimate—against homosexuals, or same gender loving people, within the
fabric of modern day and urban society; starting from the very obvious
perceptions to the very subtle ones that exist naturally. For those that know
me, I will not be taking my usual Christian slant. Instead, I will attempt to
explore these social observations purely from an objective standpoint, perhaps
traversing into the psycho-social realm. My goal is an attempt to brood a
generalized and broader understanding of the dynamics that the homosexual
populations bring, in the attempt to interact peacefully with heterosexuals.



I believe that as a society, we are slowly but surely growing in knowledge,
awareness, tolerance and information when it comes to multiculturalism. (Some
of us more than others). But one demographic that has risen as a burgeoning
population is LGBT's. By my short historical account, this population really
didn't start earning respect as a sub-culture until well after the late 1970's.
Even so, hatred and ostracism continues and persists well into the new
millennium.



Why is that?



For several illegitimate reasons, and others for some very confusing reasons.
Let's take a quick look—from the very shallow to the deep seated reasons—of why
that is.



Not even acknowledging the very hatred some have of others who are generally
different from themselves, I won't go there. (Although I believe that their
hatred stems way beyond simple dislike—but lies in a deep seated issue, more in
a moment) I'll start with the common misconception of disagreement of choices.



It used to be that conservative heterosexuals didn't like gays simply because
they were homosexual; or same gender loving people. I find this concept to
be false. There is a great chance that People Against Gays (I'll call them
PAGs...Ha!) don't even witness them engaging in sexual acts. So why the hate?
For instance, a gay person at work will obviously show no signs of his private
choices. So by assumption (or imagination) of their deeds, public opinion is
formed. This is as silly as a worker who is an admitted cheater on their
spouse. Chances are, we don't see their deeds, but we form opinions and
judgments based on clues or admitted testimony. But we still don't see it. So
why does it still matter?; especially as it relates to them being in public
places. Basically, it shouldn’t matter what they do in the privacy of their own
time. However, there are many who don’t have the gift of
‘compartmentalization.’ (See the public outcry of Bill Clinton’s and Marion
Barry’s scandal) There are some who can mentally separate the person and their
private choices. Then, there are others who cannot separate the two. Even
though with both cases (Clinton and Barry) their choices were made personally,
some suggest that their choices have no bearing on their abilities in the
public forum. Others argue this point. “The others” who cannot separate the
public person from their private actions are usually the ones who feel
uncomfortable with gays. Even though the average gay person does not have a
high profiled position, ”the others” still hold them accountable totheir own
personal moralistic standards, even when their opinion of their personal
choices doesn’t matter.



But if PAGs don’t see them do it, still why the hatred?





Another misconception is that gays will turn PAGs into homosexuals. This is
also not true. Whereas yes there may be some (a minority) who are, as they
say, "curious", an overwhelming large majority of heterosexuals are
confident in their orientation. But unfortunately PAGs affront a strong
aversion to any gay person, not realizing their own self confidence in their
orientation. So the common misconception of PAGs being homophobic because of
conversion is very overrated.



So what is it? Why do PAGs strongly protest LGBT's?



I want to suggest to you that it is primarily a matter of pheromone confusion.
Let me explain.



Every person, both male and female, has testosterone and estrogen hormones
inside of them. The typical male has 10-times more testosterone than the
typical female and vice versa; the typical female has 10-times more estrogen
than the typical male. When a male or female self-esteem and/or self confidence
is in the healthy to high range, they emit their dominant hormone to higher
levels. Females emit their estrogen which socially turns into femininity. (Some
other nicknames for this are: dainty, prissy, elegant, sweet, and sexy)
Likewise, males emit their testosterone which translates into masculinity.
(Nicknames for this trait are: machismo, bravado, manly, and swagger) Both of
these social traits show a display of confidence and comfort with their
personage. In the social laws of human interaction and attraction, being
comfortable and confident with oneself is an instant aphrodisiac.



With this in mind, let’s move on with the “typical” gay male. Whether by nature
or nurture, the quintessential gay male emits more levels of estrogen than a typical
male. (Not all, of course) This estrogen leads to social-femininity. In
traditional society, women were the leaders in this vibration. From the
high-pitched voice, the slinky walk and body movement, to color filled emotions
and sassy personality. The confusion comes in where testosterone driven men, by
nature, are hard-wired to respond to femininity. Consider it the same as
smelling your favorite food coming from your computer keyboard. The smell is
strong, but the source is confusing. By nature, you have a bodily response to
the smell of food, but the fact that it’s coming from your computer keyboard—a
completely different visual clue—is off-putting. To the typical heterosexual,
this can be very confusing. So when they get the vibe of estrogen, or femininity,
from a male source, confusion can lead to frustration. Frustration can lead to
anger or worse, hatred. (This author has not studied the in depth effects of
how typical women feel when a testosterone-driven woman enters the social
circle, but can only imagine that, at the very least, “it gets weird”)



Why is that?



Our typical feminine and masculine qualities were designed to work like magnets
toward the opposite sex. Just like magnets, we radiate a “magnetic field”
around us when our masculine/feminine hormones are heightened in proportion to
our self-confidence/self-esteem. And just like magnets and their polarizations,
typically in humans, ‘like’, or the same magnetsusually do not attract
each other—they repel. So it becomes “weird” at best, when natural signals of
attraction are sounding, but the visual does not correlate. This, I believe,
explains the subtle confusion, and uneasiness that is felt in thriving and
budding social situations.



Alas, there are those who are aware and respectful of differing orientations,
but still may have slight pause in mixed-orientated social interaction. This is
due to gender role typecasting. On the surface, the traditional expectation is
for “a man to be a man” and “a lady to be a lady.” But a deeper issue is
because of the noted affirmation of gender bonding. Traditionally, males and
females hang out together with the same sex, with the purpose and result of
building up each other’s self-identification through gender mirroring. This
interaction is void of erotica, and used primarily for affirming one’s
identification. The proverbial “record gets scratched” when a traditional
social circle encounters a visual cue (gay person) emitting differing
pheromones. (Consider the cheeseburger smelling keyboard example) Placement in
a traditional all male (or female) social circle seems to dawdle for the gay
person a little, as the individual is not affirming their same sex heterosexual
bystanders, because they’re not radiating the same hormone. (And of course the
rules of attraction pertaining to transmitting hormones for social sexual
interplay are closely guarded and enforced by traditionalists). But for this
reason, gays are quicker to “hang out” with an opposite sexed, but same
hormonal social circle. Here is where they find their gender mirroring,
self-worth and affirmation of identification.



For instance, take the fictional TV sitcom Will & Grace. Jack, a
particularly effeminate gay male, is especially “attracted” to, not Grace—a
typical female, but Karen—a noted alpha female who demonstrates a slightly
higher level of self-confidence equaling to higher levels of femininity of her
person. I can only suggest this is the same in the male circle with
testosterone oriented females, however I have no example to provide for this
validation.



Why is all of this important?



I believe that some of the slightest of aversions to the most impassioned of
hatred of same gender loving people from traditional conversatives is stemmed
from natural, chemical, and psycho-social reactions in our bodies and minds.
And though, there are some who try to push past the perceived social stigmas or
even personal preferences, they still will find a certain awkwardness when
trying to interact in a gregarious social setting. And for gays, they still
have the pressure to either neutralize their hormone exudation or be highly
selective of where to socially interact.



Either way, the reasons for perceived homophobia is actually stemmed from
intrinsic chemical receptors, and not so much just from mental pride and
prejudice. I believe as a society, we can get past the mental aspect through
information and other means. As far as broad acceptance in all the social
spheres and interaction, that remains to be seen